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Monday August 07 2006

[ADDITIONAL NOTE TO ALL COMMENTERS:  The phrase “Billion Monkeys” does NOT refer to Muslims, It refers to Digital Photographers.]

*

Not that there is much to see.

Need I say more?  Well, yes: note the particularly fine left-hand finger work, a typical Billion Monkey practice.  Keep those fingers right out of the shot!

image

From here, via here.

really i feel sorry for people like you , if you dont know what are you talking about dont talk , what do you really want from sweet pure heart women like these ones. they are beautiful and cute but they never show this to all men only their families.

Posted by star on 04 May 2007

star

How dare you!  I am one of the world’s leading experts on Billion Monkeys and in particular their hand movements, and when I write about this I know exactly what I am talking about.  This is a subject the world needs me to talk about.

As for what I want from these women, I got it.  They have participated in one of the great Billion Monkey snaps of all time.  I only wish I’d taken it myself, but at least somebody did.

You tell us that you know that these ladies are beautiful and cute, you so you must have seen them all without their black letterbox outside clothing.  So, you must be the guy in white, yes?  Congratulations on being the star of such a famous photo.  A star indeed.

Posted by Brian Micklethwait on 04 May 2007

Brian, this is hilarious. Thank you for lightening up my day.

Posted by Tat on 09 May 2007

i dont c anything funny abt it.. u mind ur own business and ur own culture.. and dont talk abt what u dont know.

Posted by mj on 15 May 2007

Cor Blimey!

MJ - get those facts straight!

This guy IS the world expert on the Billion Monkey phenomenon. He knows everything “abt” it.

His observations on the culture of the Billion Monkeys are legendary. Much like you, I’m sure Brian Micklethwait sees no humour in this picture, merely another perfect example of Billion Monkeytude.

No, Billion Monkeyism may not be his culture, but it is his passion. How you cannot recognise that is completely beyond me.

Posted by 6000 on 15 May 2007

...besides, it’s a privelege of a free man (and especially a woman, come to think of it), to talk about what you don’t know.

Posted by Tat on 15 May 2007

as a canaidian muslim please KNOW;
religion and culture are 2 different things!!!

i don’t understand whats the deal with this pic?
now muslims can’t take pics either? when you go on vacation don;t you take pics? thats what this photo looks like and some one thaught it would be funny to take a pic of it cuz they don’t understand why the muslims would want to take the picture in the first place.  believe it our not but like alot of peps say “they all look the same” they actually don’t, if you look close enough to detail. its like saying all birds or all flowers look the same

Posted by Malaak-Jayne on 06 June 2007

They should start putting people like you in gunatanamo bay. Billion monkey? You reek of ignorance.

Posted by revolutionary on 14 June 2007

you really crack me up. now u left everything and just started talking about these people coz they didnt bother anyone??

dear, there r billion of other people rape, steal and cause harm in this world, u better talk about what makes your life better OK?

u western are christian, but I dont see anyone from u guys goes to the church. if u dont respect ur religion leave other people do.

by the way, u said u r one of the world’s leading experts, but i dint think u know much about muslims, coz if u really do u will know how could ((STAR)) knowa that these women are cute and beautiful. u know nothing man, sorry for u

Posted by Rania on 24 August 2007

Al salam alaykom.
peace upon you.
this is islam during you insulting islam because islam is respecting these women more than where ever your mind can lead you to, our religion advice us to respect those who speak about islam by mistake by ignorance of the reality of islam the religion of peace and respection for human being.
islam is this religion that respect any opinion what ever it was and as you don’t know about islam please i advice you to read about islam especially woman in islam and im sure that you will change your opinion about what you think about this great religion.

thanks

Posted by mohammad on 09 October 2007

Do you know what, you people commenting on here who are getting at Brian? You’ve all missed the vital, one thing! The gentleman is using the ultimate Billion-Monkey camera - an Olympus Mju! I know, for I have one too!

Therefore Brian is quite right after all!

I also would like to flag, for future discussion perhaps, an interesting linguistico-syntactical question about cultural differences in the use of punctuation in computer/tepehone/txt-comms, but maybe another time, eh?

Interestingly, the anti-spam code I had to type was
“miss94”. How droll-ly strange this world can sometimes be.

PS I also wonder where “gunatanamo bay” could be?

Posted by David on 11 October 2007

David,

I am reliably informed that “gunatanamo bay” is in “Qba”.

P.S. I h8 txt spk, bt its evn wrse wen its bein typt on a keybrd.

Posted by 6000 on 12 October 2007

Thanks 6000!

For one horrible moment, I was afraid that the guy calling himself “revolutionary” was talking about Guantanamo Bay which is of course in Cuba. I could not imagine that he would want to suggest that Brian be sent there.

Posted by David on 13 October 2007

David, I think he meant to invite Brian to qabba (also spelled as kabba, in some quarters). It’s a traditional muslim hospitality!

Posted by Tatyana on 14 October 2007

What’s so funny in this. Who knows if he is taking a photograph using an X-ray camera which can seethrough after processing.

Posted by Nothing so funny on 31 October 2007

We, as muslims, are commanded by Allah and the prophrt Mohamed (pbuh) to respect the others and don’t respond to their insults as they don’t know about Islam which if you know well, you will not do like what you did.

So please, know well about Islam before you judge

Posted by yasmine on 27 November 2007

Assalam 3la man etab3 al-houda

I’m muslim in saudi arabia ..

the pic is very nice .. ^_^

Brian ..

Life without Islam like fifty without five ..  ~_~

He laughs best who laughs last .. :)

I would like to you know about Islam .. ok

Hind >> (^_^)

Posted by Hind - ksa on 14 December 2007

he wasn’t suppose to take such a picture ,, some people are just stupid by nature ,, unless they can recognize the lady by her eyes and body shape it will be fine am very serious /..my mama wear just like them but she takes off her face cover when she wants to take a pic .. ano thing shame about “Hejab” it actually tells how deep our culture is and our moral values also ,,, this was taken in Lebanon btw ….

Salam

Posted by Naff21 on 24 December 2007

Ignorance allows us to speak for others rather than talking to them to learn and know more. The very women I was taught to understand that they were oppressed, beaten, kept as sex slaves and allowed no social lives nor education are really quite the opposite.

Muslim women are absolutely the most intelligent, didactic females I’ve ever encountered and their dress demands respect of the otherwise visually-oriented men they’re surrounded by and interact with, of whom many a man would gladly suggest sexual activities he’d like to take part in with her if given the opportunity, initially titillated by the female’s attire.

Posted by Rafael the ex-Christian on 07 January 2008

Ummmmmmmmmmmm.

Sorry. Not quite with you there Rafael. I don’t find these poor women’s attire at all titillating. Moreover, even if I was to talk with each of them for some time, very didactically of course, while they was so dressed, and of course in the presence of their male relatives or else they (or I) would be beheaded (or is it stoned?) I would not know what kind of sexual activities, if any, I would want to undertake with any of them.

Now then, take any one of them; she might, over a drink in a nice bar (watched over by her husband of course) give me some clue, such as .....

“actually, you know, underneath this heavy black heat-absorbing desert material, I’m a pretty woman with long dark hair and very brown eyes, and I measure 30G-25-37 and I am 5ft-1-inch tall and I have a nice sexy curvaceous tummy!” .....

But I don’t think she’d do that, do you? Let’s call your take “theory A”.

The black stuff gets in the way of normal human relationships, and how anatomically-modern hominids such as Homo Sapiens Sapiens Caucasiensis (sp.) “displays” sexually, for mating purposes (which the females do, absolutely, and not the males. Whcih is why the males can still get rat-arsed on lager in clubs, in T-shirts and jeans, and still get laid, and the females have to wear almost nothing and gyrate to music. You’re not saying that only the Sultan who watches his nude belly-dancers is the only one who can have sex, are you?) By the way, apart from “arranged marriages” in such places as the pre-capitalist tribal regions, how ought a good Moslem man go about finding a wife who is suitable for him? I’m just interested to know how it is done, given that this garb is supposed to be theoretically mandatory, and I’m half-Syrian.

Posted by David Davis on 08 January 2008

I guess also, Rafael, what I ought to have added was that if she was only half-dressed such as a Western woman in a public place such as a “club” would ordinarily be, as is customary in the Lands of the Dhimmi, then I would automatically know whether I wanted to have the above conversation with her which you and I referred to, or if not - then a different one, say instead about the “metaphysical totality of the human socio-psychological experience in a very real way”.

Posted by David Davis on 08 January 2008

truly just very ignorant BRIAN, and how respectful to others of other cultures, u wudnt wnt me laughin at ur culture(thats if u actually have one) wud u??.. I mean WHO r u or anyone else to speak of these people in such way??.. MYOB brian.. u knw its funny how when u c sum ladies just cross lets say for example a room full of people with just a skimpy lookin bikini, revealin every damnin thing shes desperate to show, NO ONE says a damn thing at all, everyone agrees tht its her business, as a matter of fact it may regarded as “ normal “ but when u see a fully coverd lady, dressed quite modestly esp. compared to the lady wt the bikini, u start hearing sum busybodies talkin about her been either/; oppressd, abused etc.... and just more crap!!!.. fr GOD’S sake everyone has a flammin rite to weAR watevr the wish to wtout bein asked why or been judged by certain critics who just cant seem to c reason in anythin but whts in their so called “ brainy thoughts”..  wht dirty society we have today, most just wantin women to strip just more and more and to be lookd at as “ free meat,to touch, see and enjoy wt no payment”??, so whts the the next norm??.. walkin around naked wt ur hands on one ur private parts????…

Posted by diana rose on 22 January 2008

For fuck sakes people lighten up! If someone wants to talk shit about a culture they barely know about, it none of anyone else’s business…

Posted by Amir on 22 January 2008

ha ha ha ha ha

You just jealousy of Billion muslim oh my god that is so hard ...I know how you feel it is too hard and i just want to tell you something

Growing up you’re look like kid ..!

if you want to be celebrated ..don’t use muslim to be star ...There is alot of 1000000000000000 way to be CELEBRATED ....!

And by the way if you looking for Monkey go to the zoo ...and if mean this family are Monkeys and you belive the humans start like Monkeys amd promotion ...Where is the problem ?

Posted by AASH on 27 January 2008

Not that the people who need to know will read this, they’ll just assume different, but Billion Monkeys are digital photographers, not Muslims.  Hence “Muslim” Billion Monkey in the title of the posting.  If Billion Monkeys were Muslims, why the “Muslim”?

Posted by Brian Micklethwait on 27 January 2008

Brian,
an unfortunate coincidence.

The righteous idiots commenting in this post think “1 Billion Moslems” means “1 Billion Monkeys.” I never liked the expression, for reasons that have become clear.

Let’s be honest, if you meant to use “monkey” for “Moslem”, it would be offensive. Of course the evil shitheads who are stirring this up are not sending out links to your previous postings such as this one. Why would they?

It would take a serious amount of stupidity or a deliberate hate-mongering to claim that the Maria Sharapova look-alikes are people you think are Moslems.

Posted by Antoine Clarke on 27 January 2008

What about Mary the mother of Jesus -peace be upon them-?

she covers her head as well!!

another thing,

if you go to the zoo, you will see the monkey doesn’t cover its body at all

so what about the billion of people who took the shyness off and started showing up with their bodies?

really this is not a logical way to talk about something especially something that touch a religion

don’t be a radical person who just belittle others ideas in trying to be sarcastic sir

ethnic is not a good thing as you know

Posted by saudi girl on 28 March 2008

Oh my! I just now saw this. Such a simple little post to draw such hatred and so many assumptions.  People this easily offended deserve to be offended. Good job, Brian.

Posted by Lynn on 28 March 2008

^ ^

yeah,

really, as what you said, such little posts show the sensation of someone facing the others

so we will be able to understand their way of thinking if they are “democratic” and accept others ideas and beliefs or not

really i don’t know what the benefits in talking about others beliefs or deeds while they have the total freedome in their matters

Posted by saudi girl on 28 March 2008

Perhaps the poor old chap just wanted a photo of his wives, or daughters or whatever, in front of something or other.

But it is a pity that they have to go about dressed quite unlike any other women on the planet. Has anybody else thought about this matter? And whay is it such a big deal for them to be able to (not be able to) smile openly for their loved-one’s camera?

Posted by David Davis on 28 March 2008

I’m sorry, it’s time to buzz the tower.

I think the whole forced cover-up thingy is really really sad and unnecessary.

In AD 647, you may want to hide your female slaves and captured widows, for a while. But what then?

Posted by John Sobieski on 28 March 2008

women be in black clothes better than beeing bitchs

Posted by mmm on 21 April 2008

This post truly is the gift that keeps on giving.

Posted by 6000 on 22 April 2008

i live in Turkiye.. Islam sux dude

Posted by Cenk on 24 April 2008

hi , i see the good picture for all women , because when i see women with bikini ? i wanna fucked her , and when i see women with jens , i wanna see her ass , so when i see women with black dressed like picture , what i feel ? any one can answer me ?  no feeling , so .........

the muslim women be safe with this dressed from all bad men .

Posted by realdanc on 24 April 2008

oh good picture :

where is the problem in this picture , i think Brian wanna see her ass like his sister or see her pussy like his wife , no u cant with muslim women , because her know what she do in her life not like u .

ok , can u tell me what defrent between me and u when i see ur wife , i see her ass like u , i see her budy like u , i see everything like u , but the defrent u touch her im not , u can thinking about this , and giv the people freedom .

Posted by David Richard on 24 April 2008

have a laugh on them keep religion away from it, i will remind you that you are not better then them when you laugh at them , low life as you are…

no religion asked me to say this to you, i say it because i wanted.. you man in the usa you are all a shit, perver, criminal, killer, woman abuser, raper, gay, fucking girly… take off those ball you dont need them…

shalom

Posted by joe on 29 April 2008

Allah Will punish u Sooner or later 4 saying this abt such Religious People U need to know alot abt Islam To know Who They Really Are And Stop saying so abt Muslims Bcuz they r Alot better than you

Posted by Muslim on 04 May 2008

in the name of Allah

first salam alaycom

second
I advise you to

learn and read about the islam from Good Books

And these girls not monkeys these girls good Because hear to Allah speech in the Quraan in
sura al Noor

Posted by al_seera Q8 on 04 May 2008

Hello to all, 1st of, i’m not aware of all the comments above but i sure would like to say what i see and believe is correct whether i’m a Christian or muslim.
Brian, thanks for quoting ‘ DOES NOT REFER TO MUSLIMS’ & thanks for the picture, i do not see a big issue here for everybody to go back and forth on unnecessary comments!! Its such a shame that we’re all humans regardless of what religion we belong to. Just follow your heart and it will lead you.

Thanks to whomever started this chain of hate between both parties. It’s ONLY a picture NOTHING more, and with the women in veils, SO WHAT?? It’s an OPINION, NOTHING MORE. We laugh at this and we laugh at that, don’t turn it into a spiteful debate from your imagination, just becoz someone made a few comments, GROW UP! You c, how you react is simply how people think of you. IT is SO UNnecessary to blow up embassies and kill innocent people JUST BECOZ someone drew a few caricatures of the prophet, it’s always educational to start a dialogue, not turn against the whole west, plus the artist simply does not reflect on the rest of his/her people or the world.
By the way, the photograph above has been sent to my email earlier, and YES i consider it a picture i would laugh about and it was quoted by an ARAB saying ‘What’s the Point?’.
With education, we can learn to understand Humanity, to live & love everything around us, let us not attack each other, with CONFIDENCE in YOU, you cannot be insulted.
Lana, UK

Posted by Tara on 29 June 2008

Yes, i am muslim, It’s fucking rule they are chasing, all other community none of the ladies are doing like this, Prostitution are doing these such people more, One muslim country the ladies will wear all the burka without anything under the burka, its free they can intercourse with any one with any time at any where.
if we will say lot of the things we have to explain c u later.

Posted by shabnam on 01 July 2008

so ridiculous as islam anyway, thoses brain stop thousand years ago and follow the stupid book from someone no one can proof it did exist. so pity

Posted by paul on 09 July 2008

Yeah, guy, you are a very observant person or “sharp as a needle”…

Posted by Terry Brown on 20 July 2008

oh this people are sick in head you must have some poison linkin in ur brain so it makes you not realize about much things,if you not in some culture it doesnt reall mean you have to hate on those,this womens are so cute in they looks ya be just so curious to trie to find if u can see any devil part in them but they are so pretect from all those nasty things,so you let you girls or lady to show up the forms to other man’s and be all that xx them later to be mad saying or u are cheated on me which you d one have like that so please used your brain and stop hate on others if you not luck to join in stay where you are it doesnt reall bother us but this is us and this is how may ALLAH have want us to be like and we all do the best we can about it non of ya can stop us and we are untouchble. peace out

Posted by boubacar on 03 October 2008

YOU LOT CAN LAUGH NOW BUT WHEN YOU DIE YOU WON’T BE LAUGHING TRUST ME!!!!!!!! YOU’RE SSOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO IGNORANT JUST TAKE OUT AN HOUR AND THINK ABOUT LIFE, AND WHY YOU LIVE AND WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN TO YOU WHEN YOU DIE, THEN READ ABOUT ISLAM, EVERYTHING WLL BECOME SOOO CLEAR!! TRUST ME I WAS IN YOUR PLACE ONCE bUT YOU KNOW WHAT THIS RELIGION THAT YOU’RE MOCKING IS THE TRUTH WETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT

Posted by JEAN on 26 November 2008

P.S IF THEM FOUR WOMEN WERE WEARING BIKINIS, THERE’D BE NO COMMENT,YOU’D TREAT THEM LIKE PIECES OF MEAT, AND YOU LIKE DOGS LOOKING AT THEM, AND THEN YOU HAVE THE CHEEK TO CALL US MUSLIMS ANIMALS.............GET OVER IT WE’RE MUSLIMS AND WE LOVE OUR RELIGION MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THE WORLD, WE GET ON WITH OUR LIVES YOU GET ON WITH YOUR OWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Jean on 26 November 2008
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